When you think about the most confident women you know, what characteristics come to mind? Do they carry themselves with an air of success, grace, and determination? Does the energy change when they enter a room? Are they inspiring and memorable whilst still being warm and approachable?
We all have our own descriptions of what confidence looks like, but here are some common traits that confident women don’t have.
- They don’t suppress their feelings. When something is on their mind, you will know it. They tell it like it is. With confidence comes the ability to speak your mind in a way that others hear you.
- They don’t gossip. Confident women don’t talk about other women, they talk about their dreams, plans and aspirations.
- They don’t try to please people. When a woman is self-assured, she doesn’t need external approval. This allows them to be their true-selves and trust that people who like her, like her for who she truly is.
- They don’t have regrets. They learn from the past and they recognise where they have made poor choices but there’s no regret. Being able to learn from the past rather than regret it oozes confident.
- They don’t give in to peer pressure. This is largely due to the fact that they don’t feel peer pressure. Pressure is reserved for those who stress about what others think and the confident woman just doesn’t.
- They don’t glorify busy. Productive is different from busy. They get the job done, they just don’t feel overwhelmed as they are doing it.
- They don’t take things personally. They understand that your opinion is about you, not about them. While they value your input, if you don’t agree with their choices, they still make them. And they still like you.
- They never compromise on self-care. Confident women know that they need to take care of themselves. They value a healthy work/life balance and they take time to eat right, sleep well and to spend an occasional moment being pampered just because it feels good.
- They don’t ignore their instincts. Even when all the facts seem to point one way, if their gut says the other, that is the way they go. They know that instinct is our strongest ally in decision making so they listen to it religiously.
- They don’t waste time worrying about things outside of their control. Time is valuable so spending time on “what-if”, “should-have” or “could-have-been” is not useful to the confident woman. If it’s outside of their circle of influence they let it go.
This may sound like an impossible list only achievable by the perfect woman. However, my idea in sharing these behaviours isn’t to make you feel bad about yourself. Instead, recognise the positive characteristics you already have and choose one that you’d like to work towards.
Stay safe and well.